After saying I wouldn't write another short story I have done just that. It just goes to show you should never say never! This is kind of fanfic type short story. The idea actually came to me from this tweet...
The Crush
by Kath Lambert
Years went by and I knew Aaron looked at me as nothing but a little sister. Especially as I was so much younger than him, the age gap between me and him being the same as between me and my brother, 10 years.
Over time my brother lost touch with Aaron. They were inseparable for years but one day, seemingly overnight, they just stopped speaking. Over what, I will never know. Or so I thought.
In the years that passed I never gave much thought to Aaron other than the occasional 'I wonder what happened to him, gee he was kinda hot' thoughts. They were fleeting and didn't tend to stay in my head for long.
I moved away from my home town around the same time as my brother was settling down to marriage and kids. The 10 year gap between us never more evident as he was becoming a family man in his 30s and I was becoming, well, myself I guess, in my 20s.
By my 30s I'd become a successful lawyer, no husband or kids but I wasn't looking for that, and was quite pleased with how my life was turning out. I visit my now 40 something brother and his family regularly, and think how nice it would be to someday have what he has, but I can't see anything on the immediate horizon.
That was until this morning when I walked into court and saw Aaron James standing by the door to my courtroom. He was leaning against the doorframe in a grey suit and tie over a crisp white shirt, his hands in his pockets. I hadn't seen him in more than 10 years but I'd recognise him anywhere. Age had given his face a rugged quality. His hair was the same dirty blonde I remembered, though worn in a style more suited to a man in his early 40s.
"Miss Thorn, well I'll be." He pronounced Miss as Miz and removed his hands from his pockets to embrace me. I recalled that he and my brother used to work out. Clearly he still was as I didn't recall him having arms like this when he was a younger man. He kissed me on each cheek and smelled divine. I had yet to say anything. 13 year old me was still tongue tied. I pushed her down and forced my 31 year old kick ass lawyer woman to step up.
"What are you doing here?" I asked in the nicest, none shocked tone I could muster.
"The guy you're gonna send down today was an assignment of mine. I like to make sure they get what they deserve. I saw your name on the documents for the prosecution and I thought 'it can't be THE Lara Thorn' so I thought I'd come see for myself before court was in session." He folded his arms across his chest and inspected me in a brief up and down sweep.
"An assignment of yours? What do you do now?" I asked warily. Not entirely sure I wanted to know. Though the suit he was wearing looked expensive so I was betting he wasn't a bounty hunter.
"I'm a secret agent. Ssshh. Don't tell anyone." He laughed. I wasn't sure how to read his response. "I'm kidding of course! But I can't really tell you. Suffice to say I help catch bad guys."
"Okay!" Why was he being so cryptic? "I should be going..." I started to go around him not really knowing if he was making fun of me or being serious or what.
"Wait." He reached for my arm but thought better of grabbing me in a court house. I turned to see what he had to say. "I'm gonna be here all morning. You wanna grab lunch when this is all over?" He combed his hand through his hair like he was nervous. What about I wasn't sure. I wasn't even sure he was serious about lunch? I didn't know how to read him anymore.
"Uh..." I was trying to think what to say. 13 year old me wanted to say yes, she was pleading with me, but part of me couldn't recognise this guy in front of me as the young man I'd had a crush on. But then the question reared it's ugly head. Why had he stopped being friends with my brother? I had to know. It had bothered me for years. So I accepted.
"Great, I'll meet you here?" He half suggested and half asked. "Sure." I responded and turned and walked away from him towards my client who was waiting for me outside the courtroom. When I turned to go in with her, Aaron had gone.
The case was an easy one. Bad guy went down just as Aaron had predicted and when it was all over I lead my client to the door. There were local press waiting when we reached the outer doors but my client remained silent as I'd instructed, while I told the press that a statement would be released from my office in due course. I made sure my client made it to the car waiting for her and excused myself by telling her I was required back inside the courthouse. It wasn't exactly a lie and I was nothing if not a good lawyer.
"How is he?" Aaron looked up from his coffee and for the first time I noticed a sadness in his eyes. "He's good. Married now. Two kids." I felt bad. I hadn't wanted to upset him. What the hell did I know. I was a kid when they stopped speaking. For all I knew Aaron came onto my brother and was rejected. Knowing how he felt about him Ben could never see him again. That sure would explain the sadness.
He smiled but it didn't seem genuine. "That's great. I'm really happy for him." He stirred his coffee and took a sip. He really didn't seem happy for him. It was then that our food arrived. The little girl in me was getting impatient and being in leagues with the lawyer in me I had to know. Once the waitress was out of earshot I asked him THE question. "So... why did you stop being friends?" I glanced at him quickly to gauge his reaction to the question. He'd just taken a bite of his steak sandwich but he held it in front of him, a puzzled look on his face, as though it was chicken instead of steak, but I knew the look was in regard to the question, not the sandwich. He looked sideways at me, boldly, kind of incredulously and swallowed. "You mean you don't know?" His eyes bore into me, the way I sometimes looked at a witness, trying to read the truth from them without them having to speak.
"Know what?" I asked, trying to avoid his gaze. If I was right about the gay thing I didn't want him to think I'd known that all along. I played nervously with my pasta salad.
"I asked him but he never told me. He would just tell me to drop it so I did. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked. It's clearly private and I shouldn't have asked." I felt like leaving but I'd only just started my lunch and I was starving from being in court all morning. I started eating, figuring the silence might alleviate the tension. I could feel Aaron's gaze still on me as I twirled pasta around my fork. He took a deep breath.
"How old were you when we, when Ben and I stopped being friends?" I stopped to think. "I dunno, around 16 or 17. I don't think I'd left high school. Why?" I wasn't following his train of thought so I hoped he was going somewhere with this. "So I would have been around 26, 27?" He'd turned to face me again. "Yeah I guess?" I took another bite, maybe if I couldn't speak he'd stop asking me questions. He leaned back in his chair, considering how to phrase his next response. "Right. And at that age, the age you were I mean, you were starting to develop. That's fair to say right?" He gesticulated to his chest when he said 'develop' so I had a pretty good idea where he was going now. "Yeah I guess so. I sprouted a few inches and my boobs came in if that's what you're getting at?" I wasn't sure if I was angry or happy that he'd noticed my boobs. Though as I got my first bra for athletics at school they were kinda hard not to notice.
"See now I sound like a dick." He rested his arm on the table in defeat.
I could hear him scrambling in the diner and calling my name as I walked out the door. A few minutes later he was running down the street after me. I stopped to hail a cab but they were all taken and he was getting closer. "Wait goddamnyou!" He spat as he reached me. He grabbed both of my arms in his hands. No polite half heartedness on the sidewalk. "What?" I asked in my restrained state. I shrugged and he loosened his grip slightly. "Why'd you run out like that?" He seemed genuinely bewildered. "I won't be made fun of Aaron." I shrugged again and this time he let me go. "What are you talking about? I wasn't making fun of you? You asked why your brother and I stopped being friends. It's because I wanted you."
"I knew Ben would stay true to his word, so I left town. I got a job out of state and I tried to forget you Lara I really did. But when I saw your name on those court documents I had to know if it was you." He brushed my cheek with his thumb. It was only then I realised I was crying. I covered his hand with my own and reached for him with the other. I kissed him softly, suddenly remembering all the times I'd done it in my head. It was better in reality. He kissed me back, more urgently and raked his other hand across my throat, pulling me to him. I could taste the coffee on his tongue.
by Kath Lambert
When I was young, around 12 or 13, I had this crush on my brother's best friend. I guess most girls tend to around that age. The problem for the girl in this scenario is that the best friend never tends to see said girl as anything more than an annoying tag along to their boys games or worse, as an extension to their own family, essentially looking on said girl as their own little sister.
Years went by and I knew Aaron looked at me as nothing but a little sister. Especially as I was so much younger than him, the age gap between me and him being the same as between me and my brother, 10 years.
Over time my brother lost touch with Aaron. They were inseparable for years but one day, seemingly overnight, they just stopped speaking. Over what, I will never know. Or so I thought.
In the years that passed I never gave much thought to Aaron other than the occasional 'I wonder what happened to him, gee he was kinda hot' thoughts. They were fleeting and didn't tend to stay in my head for long.
I moved away from my home town around the same time as my brother was settling down to marriage and kids. The 10 year gap between us never more evident as he was becoming a family man in his 30s and I was becoming, well, myself I guess, in my 20s.
By my 30s I'd become a successful lawyer, no husband or kids but I wasn't looking for that, and was quite pleased with how my life was turning out. I visit my now 40 something brother and his family regularly, and think how nice it would be to someday have what he has, but I can't see anything on the immediate horizon.
That was until this morning when I walked into court and saw Aaron James standing by the door to my courtroom. He was leaning against the doorframe in a grey suit and tie over a crisp white shirt, his hands in his pockets. I hadn't seen him in more than 10 years but I'd recognise him anywhere. Age had given his face a rugged quality. His hair was the same dirty blonde I remembered, though worn in a style more suited to a man in his early 40s.
He looked up at me with his piercing grey blue eyes and gave me the most dazzling crooked grin, so dazzling that I think I melted inside. No damnit, I was a tough as nails lawyer, he couldn't make me feel like I was 13 again!
"Miss Thorn, well I'll be." He pronounced Miss as Miz and removed his hands from his pockets to embrace me. I recalled that he and my brother used to work out. Clearly he still was as I didn't recall him having arms like this when he was a younger man. He kissed me on each cheek and smelled divine. I had yet to say anything. 13 year old me was still tongue tied. I pushed her down and forced my 31 year old kick ass lawyer woman to step up.
"What are you doing here?" I asked in the nicest, none shocked tone I could muster.
"The guy you're gonna send down today was an assignment of mine. I like to make sure they get what they deserve. I saw your name on the documents for the prosecution and I thought 'it can't be THE Lara Thorn' so I thought I'd come see for myself before court was in session." He folded his arms across his chest and inspected me in a brief up and down sweep.
"An assignment of yours? What do you do now?" I asked warily. Not entirely sure I wanted to know. Though the suit he was wearing looked expensive so I was betting he wasn't a bounty hunter.
"I'm a secret agent. Ssshh. Don't tell anyone." He laughed. I wasn't sure how to read his response. "I'm kidding of course! But I can't really tell you. Suffice to say I help catch bad guys."
"Okay!" Why was he being so cryptic? "I should be going..." I started to go around him not really knowing if he was making fun of me or being serious or what.
"Wait." He reached for my arm but thought better of grabbing me in a court house. I turned to see what he had to say. "I'm gonna be here all morning. You wanna grab lunch when this is all over?" He combed his hand through his hair like he was nervous. What about I wasn't sure. I wasn't even sure he was serious about lunch? I didn't know how to read him anymore.
"Uh..." I was trying to think what to say. 13 year old me wanted to say yes, she was pleading with me, but part of me couldn't recognise this guy in front of me as the young man I'd had a crush on. But then the question reared it's ugly head. Why had he stopped being friends with my brother? I had to know. It had bothered me for years. So I accepted.
"Great, I'll meet you here?" He half suggested and half asked. "Sure." I responded and turned and walked away from him towards my client who was waiting for me outside the courtroom. When I turned to go in with her, Aaron had gone.
I'd been a lawyer for five years and been in courtrooms all over the place but I loved New York courtrooms more than any other. Even the little ones that looked like they were made of cardboard. This one was one of the more grand looking. Today we were in the New York County Supreme Court near City Hall. Outside it's all Corinthian Columns but inside it looks like any other courtroom. Just bigger. All wood panelling and harsh lighting.
As we walked in I noticed Aaron at the back of the public seating area. He gave me a nod as I lead my client to our seats at the front of the courtroom. We went over her concerns as we waited for her husband to be brought up from the holding cells with his lawyer.
The case was an easy one. Bad guy went down just as Aaron had predicted and when it was all over I lead my client to the door. There were local press waiting when we reached the outer doors but my client remained silent as I'd instructed, while I told the press that a statement would be released from my office in due course. I made sure my client made it to the car waiting for her and excused myself by telling her I was required back inside the courthouse. It wasn't exactly a lie and I was nothing if not a good lawyer.
When I turned to go back in I could see the press were still outside and would be trying desperately to get me to answer their questions if I went back inside. Thankfully Aaron realised this and made his way outside to me.
"Ready?" He asked and offered me his arm which I took. "You were great in there you know?" He again half told me and half asked. It was as if he didn't know how to be around me anymore.
I suggested we go to a small and usually quiet diner I liked just around the corner on Lafayette street. We took seats side by side at the bar that lined the wall and ordered drinks while we started our idle chat, how've you been, what have you been up to, married, kids etc? By the time the food came I could hold onto my question no longer. "You've not asked me about Ben?" I prompted. Wondering if this would get me the answer or if I'd have to ask it directly. I was no stranger to asking direct questions but I didn't want to interrogate him.
"How is he?" Aaron looked up from his coffee and for the first time I noticed a sadness in his eyes. "He's good. Married now. Two kids." I felt bad. I hadn't wanted to upset him. What the hell did I know. I was a kid when they stopped speaking. For all I knew Aaron came onto my brother and was rejected. Knowing how he felt about him Ben could never see him again. That sure would explain the sadness.
He smiled but it didn't seem genuine. "That's great. I'm really happy for him." He stirred his coffee and took a sip. He really didn't seem happy for him. It was then that our food arrived. The little girl in me was getting impatient and being in leagues with the lawyer in me I had to know. Once the waitress was out of earshot I asked him THE question. "So... why did you stop being friends?" I glanced at him quickly to gauge his reaction to the question. He'd just taken a bite of his steak sandwich but he held it in front of him, a puzzled look on his face, as though it was chicken instead of steak, but I knew the look was in regard to the question, not the sandwich. He looked sideways at me, boldly, kind of incredulously and swallowed. "You mean you don't know?" His eyes bore into me, the way I sometimes looked at a witness, trying to read the truth from them without them having to speak.
"Know what?" I asked, trying to avoid his gaze. If I was right about the gay thing I didn't want him to think I'd known that all along. I played nervously with my pasta salad.
"Why we fell out? You really don't know?" He turned to face me then, laughed and threw his arms up. "All this time and he's never told you?" Aaron looked volatile in that moment, like he'd have taken a swing for Ben if he'd been in the room. Being so close to him at the bar I felt a little intimidated. I mirrored his turn and faced him to see if that eased the tension between us. It didn't. "That little..." He forced himself to silence and turned back to face the wall. He tore another bite from his sandwich and shook his head as he chewed.
"I asked him but he never told me. He would just tell me to drop it so I did. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked. It's clearly private and I shouldn't have asked." I felt like leaving but I'd only just started my lunch and I was starving from being in court all morning. I started eating, figuring the silence might alleviate the tension. I could feel Aaron's gaze still on me as I twirled pasta around my fork. He took a deep breath.
"How old were you when we, when Ben and I stopped being friends?" I stopped to think. "I dunno, around 16 or 17. I don't think I'd left high school. Why?" I wasn't following his train of thought so I hoped he was going somewhere with this. "So I would have been around 26, 27?" He'd turned to face me again. "Yeah I guess?" I took another bite, maybe if I couldn't speak he'd stop asking me questions. He leaned back in his chair, considering how to phrase his next response. "Right. And at that age, the age you were I mean, you were starting to develop. That's fair to say right?" He gesticulated to his chest when he said 'develop' so I had a pretty good idea where he was going now. "Yeah I guess so. I sprouted a few inches and my boobs came in if that's what you're getting at?" I wasn't sure if I was angry or happy that he'd noticed my boobs. Though as I got my first bra for athletics at school they were kinda hard not to notice.
"See now I sound like a dick." He rested his arm on the table in defeat.
"Go on, you've started now." The lawyer in me wanted him to get to his point, if he had one. "Well, I noticed." He looked up at me, rather sheepishly.
"So...?" I asked impatiently. "You're a lawyer, can't you deduce what happened when your brother's 26 year old friend noticed his 16 year old sister's breasts?" My eyes and mouth widened in shock. He'd noticed me? 16 year old me with bad skin and a tendency to be an utter geek? No, he was making fun of me again, surely, like back in the courthouse this morning. He must have realised I had a crush on him and he's making fun of me. Suddenly my hunger was gone. I stood up, threw my napkin on my plate and $30 on the bar. I didn't expect him to pay for me. I left without saying another word.
I could hear him scrambling in the diner and calling my name as I walked out the door. A few minutes later he was running down the street after me. I stopped to hail a cab but they were all taken and he was getting closer. "Wait goddamnyou!" He spat as he reached me. He grabbed both of my arms in his hands. No polite half heartedness on the sidewalk. "What?" I asked in my restrained state. I shrugged and he loosened his grip slightly. "Why'd you run out like that?" He seemed genuinely bewildered. "I won't be made fun of Aaron." I shrugged again and this time he let me go. "What are you talking about? I wasn't making fun of you? You asked why your brother and I stopped being friends. It's because I wanted you."
He pulled in a breath, I could tell he regretted the comment as soon as he'd said it. "I mean, not like that, eventually sure, but I just wanted to talk to you, get to know you. You got on my radar and after that I couldn't stop thinking about you. I kept insisting you hang out with us, that's why we used to take you to the movies with us and when we went for breakfast on Saturday mornings. He used to allow it because he knew you had a crush on me but then when I started to like you, he freaked. He told me if I ever touched you he'd kill me. I tried to tell him that I didn't want you like that, that you were too young and I didn't see you like that. I was trying to convince myself as much as him. I tried to tell him that I could just see that you were growing up and that I wanted to get to know the woman you were turning into, but he wouldn't hear it. He threw me out of your parents house and he wouldn't talk to me after that." He pulled his hand through his hair again. So it was a nervous thing after all. Part of me was thrilled at this admission and the other half a little weirded out.
"I knew Ben would stay true to his word, so I left town. I got a job out of state and I tried to forget you Lara I really did. But when I saw your name on those court documents I had to know if it was you." He brushed my cheek with his thumb. It was only then I realised I was crying. I covered his hand with my own and reached for him with the other. I kissed him softly, suddenly remembering all the times I'd done it in my head. It was better in reality. He kissed me back, more urgently and raked his other hand across my throat, pulling me to him. I could taste the coffee on his tongue.
Memories of him and Ben taking me to breakfast filled my mind. 13 year old me was shrieking, holy shit, I was kissing Aaron James. For real! I don't know how long we stood on that sidewalk but it didn't feel long enough considering how long we'd both waited to do that. Both. Not just me. I had to keep reminding myself of that. I'd believed it was a one sided crush for so long. When we stopped for air he ran his thumbs along my cheekbones and just stared at me. "Jesus Lara, where the hell have you been for the last 14 years?" "I could say the same to you!" I replied.
